Beautiful In Rope

TW: Rope, pain, body image


I am beautiful in rope
But I’m tired of constantly having to remind myself when nobody else will


Because I don’t work the way you expect me to
Or bend the way you think I do
I’m tired of riggers who hide their incompetence or indifference
Behind the language of preference


Because we are not all 5ft2, 6 stone nothing, and strong
We’re not all healthy, and female, and young


I know you’re thinking “It’s not my fault, I’m not to blame”
And I honestly don’t want to play that game


But for once I’d like to not be a challenge or a chore
To not feel shame over patterns my body wasn’t designed for
And I know some of this is bias I’ve internalised
But that’s still affected by what I see before my eyes


And you don’t owe me your attention or affection
But you should take some time for reflection
Because we are not all the same


What’s comfy to you is agony to me
Because pressure equals force divided by area
So 3 times the weight and 1.5 times the rope make suspension 2 times scarier


It’s sad when I meet people who want to get tied but think they can’t because they’re male
Or too old, too stiff, too tall, too frail
And I’m tired of seeing people ask “am I too fat to fly?”
You say “no of course not, what made you think that?” and genuinely wonder why
When every picture you share is the same body type and the same tie
And where the fuck am I?


So representation matters
Nobody else reminds me that I belong here, and I do
Because I am beautiful in rope


There is beauty when I trust a partner with my life and my health
When i give over control to someone other than myself
When I feel so connected to him or them or her
That the lines between us begin to blur
Then, I am beautiful in rope


There is beauty when I am balanced between exquisite pain and ecstatic pleasure
This is as close as I get to religion, it’s not just leisure
So I am beautiful in rope


And rope is flexible where I am not
But it seems that’s something  you forgot


We are all different but we can all belong
Your restrictions don’t make your body wrong
And we can all be beautiful in rope

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