CW: Brief Mention of Fatphobia and Dysphoria
Trans Joy is my weekly blog series celebrating the positive side of trans experiences, in an attempt to bring some balance to contemporary trans discourses. This week I’m talking about photos 🙂
Like many trans people I know, I share a lot of photos of myself. It would be easy to write this off as mere vanity, trying to get validation from friends and strangers alike, but I think there’s more to it than that.
There are very few pictures of me from when I was younger. Partly this is because as the youngest child my parents didn’t take that many (thanks Dad xD), but as I grew older it became something I actively avoided. I hated my body, partly because I was a fat child in a fatphobic world, and partly because of the feelings I now recognise as gender dysphoria. I didn’t like the way my body looked, so I tried to hide from it.
I’m now in a place where I can (sometimes) appreciate my aesthetic, particularly when my presentation aligns with my internal gender feels on that particular day. Taking photos, sharing them, and seeing my friends respond to how I look in my clothing and makeup can help affirm the pride I have in my appearance. In the pictures below I felt beautiful, powerful, and wonderfully me. I also love seeing trans friends do the same, seeing them look amazing, presenting the way they want to, and seeing the gender euphoria on their face. For me that is emotional, that is empowering, and that is fucking beautiful.
It also makes me feel visible, while not every trans person is comfortable being so, for me it feels like a powerful act. I find joy in taking up space and refusing to be discrete about who I am.
I hope you all find some joy this week too ❤ If you want to contribute to this project then please get in touch 🙂
